Posted on March 8, 2011
Reading a leaked Codex… again.
So I couldn’t help myself this morning. On a recent post over at BoLS alluded to a leaked Grey Knight codex making its rounds on the web, so I had to seek it out.
It didn’t take long to find. A simple keyword combo “warhammer grey knight torrent” in ye ol’ Google machine brought up a torrent, and the partial, poorly photocopied pdf was on my harddrive within minutes. It’s an early draft, possibly culled from the depths of a waste paper basket, but it is enough to get me through a first cup of coffee on yet another morning I find myself up earlier than seems right. It isn’t complete, missing important sections like war gear, and there aren’t many pictures, with many spaces where pictures are supposed to go marked with empty blocks titled “filler.” But it does give a run down on all of the units, and it does have the “quick sheet” section that contains point values. Which, for a bootleg copy of something I’m just going to buy in a month anyway, is good enough.
The rumors that I’ve been reading (everyone and their mom has psychic powers, Terminators with 2 wounds, the Voltron-like glory of the Dread Knight) seem to be reinforced by it. The only real surprise I found, which is the impetus for me writing this post, is the number of different Henchman the 3 types of inquisitors (hereticus, mallus and xenos, which only affects their war gear selection) can have. There are 10, count ’em 10, different Henchman to chose from in the new codex, up from 6 in the old one. One of the new Henchmen options is the Jokearo Weaponsmith. Never heard of one? Why the fuck would you have heard of one? Guess what he is? Go on, guess! Because there is no way you are going to say it is a tech-savvy Orangutan with digital weapons and a force field. But that is what it is. I would just like to be the first say (at least in our group) “right turn, Clyde.”
![](http://images.quickblogcast.com/2/7/0/1/2/129579-121072/monkey.jpg)
I got yer digital weapon right here, a$$hole.
There’s a lot of crazy stuff in the Codex, enough to warrant a longer post, I suppose. But the revelation that the Grey Knights are in league with the Planet of the Apes is plenty for now.
Map makers sometimes intentionally make errors on their maps so they can figure out who is copying them. I’ve always assumed this is why Lake Hazle was spelled Lake Hassle on my Minnesota map. I hope that space monkeys are just a way fo Games Workshop to fgure out who leaked their codex.
Hey, I for one look forward to fielding my lethal Orangutans! I hope they can arrive into play in a drop pod shaped like a barrel! You will rue the day you crossed my Techno Monkeys.
I’ll take orangutans with weapon fingers over flying late-term abortions any day.
I prefer the term “cybortion” when referencing the Cherubim. Actually, I like the word “cybortion” a lot. I foresee a possible song title.
The Return of the Jokaero!
You can’t keep good apes down.
Lemme get this straight… The Nemesis Dreadknight is a guy in power armor, put inside another, bigger, UNARMORED exo-suit?
Why would they not put some armor on the front of it? Especially considering that the guy might not even be wearing a helmet? Think of all the ornamentation they could hang off of it if they put armor on the front!
Jim, the answer is simple. The GW staff all got together, got shitfaced and watched Aliens. After much hugging and “I love you mans” were uttered after the riveting climax, a blood bond was made to ensure whatever model they designed came next, it would be in honor of brave Ripley and her loader suit. Then the next day, the same group dropped acid and watched Avatar, and then, after everyone agreed to lessen their carbon footprint (cuz, like, we’re all part of one big tree, man), they all agreed that the walkers were awesome. And more importantly, badass walkers with lots of guns should only be used by good guys.
Stupid? Yes. Will I buy one of the fucking things? Well, does Charlie Sheen think his ejaculate can cure cancer? The answer is probably.
I got the GW picture-laden e-mail the other day. That shit is bonkers. Does it count as a vehicle for armour? Walker? Or just a guy?
Seems like the Imperium had Broadside-envy.
The Dread Knight is a MC. So its more like Carnifex envy.